Feeling Hope

I've been thinking a lot lately about hope and what it means to me and to my family during this time in our life. I have to admit that a few weeks ago, I was lacking hope and I had burried my desire to have another baby.

I rationalized that we didn't have a big enough house, or maybe when Mike finishes school, among many other 'reasons' why we hadn't been chosen yet. Deep down, though, I knew that modern day miracles exist. I have proof - just look at Lilly :) She is my miracle, Heavenly Father knew she needed us and we needed her. He also knew the right time to send her to us. During our +2 year wait to be chosen again we have had lots of ups and downs with the adoption world. Several scams, a potential contact that never really turned into anything and one almost baby if we were willing to go into deep debt. I feel so blessed, so lucky to be able to experience a modern day miracle again. I am again filled with hope and am anxiously awaiting the arrival of our new baby girl.
I have learned a lot by being infertile and I am grateful for the love and support that we've had throughout our journey to build our family.

Abound in

Hope

through the Power

of the Holy Ghost

- Romans 15:13

Last week we had the amazing experience of meeting M. She is amazing and kind and talented and so fun! We also got to meet M.'s Mom, I am so glad that she has support from her mom. We talked about what wants she has for baby and also decided that an open adoption is the best plan for everyone. We are really excited for this. We feel that we aren't just adopting a baby, but a new family too. Hopefully someday Lilly's birthmother will want more contact too.
I still can't believe that this is actually happening. Yesterday at church I finally got to write my name down on the 'expecting' list they pass around in Relief Society. It felt so cool! I hope that people ask me about our new arrival, so I can spread the word about our adoption modern day miracles. Adoption has been a HUGE faith builder for me and I know with all my heart that adopting is the path that our family needs to be on.